Rocky Mountain National Park

After my orchestra audition yesterday I had nothing else planned, so I decided on a whim to drive up to the Rocky Mountain National Park. It was a further drive than I expected, but the drive itself was a beautiful trip. The Flatiron mountains around Boulder are beautiful and are full of great hikes, but as close as they are, it's still a different experience being IN the mountains from being NEXT to the mountains. The driving is a little intimidating at first but I think when I go back it'll be easier. The mountains just continue to get larger as you drive until you turn a last corner, entering Estes Park, where you are floored by the immense panorama of the national park.

The hike itself wasn't as exciting as I had hoped. The trails I had wanted to take (I had bought a small trail guide at the Boulder Bookstore) were mostly off a road that was under construction. I took the first trail I could find, which didn't have too many great views. Also, the clouds began to get a bit dark and the light wasn't good for pictures. Right now there aren't many wildflowers out, either, so it wasn't a very colorful sight. I had to turn around before I reached the Ute Meadows, where my trail was headed. 

I've invited Ryan, Leslie, Emily, and Nina, (all my fellow violin first year grad students with the exception of JiHye and Brune - I wish I could fit them in my car as well) to go back with me on Saturday. I hope the weather is better and we find a good trail. 

Chautauqua, The Sink, and Boulder Creek

Ryan and I were planning on going hiking yesterday, but I remembered that we had our violin studio party get together at Lina's, before she leaves to go play concerts. The party was really fun and I think I met just about everyone, though I may not remember all their names. I practiced in the morning and then taken a lunch break after noon. I decided to treat myself and went to The Sink, the oldest restaurant in Boulder and a super popular college hangout. Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives featured it, and it looked amazing. It did not disappoint; their burgers are the best I've ever had. Afterwards, I was too sleepy to really be productive, though. There are 7 first year MM students, (I met Brune later, since I think she had a conflict) and they are all really cool people. I had met Leslie and Emily through Ryan on exam day. Obviously I knew JiHye from Vandy, though we never really hung out before. So Nina was the only MM student that I met.

Ed Dusiniberre came and introduced himself and sat at our table for a while. He was a really nice guy and was easy to talk with. I also met a few of the older students, Adrian, a 2nd year MM violist, and Kate and Tee, both seniors (bass and violin). They were really nice and I ran into them after the party at school, and we hung out until we decided to practice. 

Today I slept in a bit, because I was up late talking to Chris (and some of the neighbors were a tad loud). So I went to a Lutheran Church nearby and really enjoyed the service. It was the first Lutheran Church service I'd been to, and I especially liked the music. I don't think that Lutheran is very far from Episcopal, but I'll have to look into it. Right now I'm not worried so much about denominations. It just seemed like it was right out of the pages of Grout, with the psalm tones and chant recitation and chorales. The worship space had an odd set up, but the ceiling was high and you could hear how chant really helped the words come through clearly.

I changed and grabbed my camera to walk to meet Ryan and his friend at Chautauqua. We started out going the same way that Mary and Shreaf and I had gone in February, but we ended up taking a different trail. It wasn't that long of a hike but it was a good workout. They wanted burgers for lunch, so I recommended The Sink, and after we stopped by Ryan and my places, we had lunch there. Today I got a pizza, the "slaughterhouse five" which has pepperoni, chicken, sausage, I think ham, and mozzarella. I saved half of it for dinner, which I will have soon. 

Ryan drove us down Canyon and we stopped to go for a dip in Boulder Creek. It was quite cold, but I didn't lose feeling in my feet. It was invigorating, especially after a hike. All in all, it was a perfect Sunday, and I hope to go hiking a lot more before the snows close down the trails.

O Pioneers! (& Lists of Authors)

So I couldn't help myself. I had to go to the Boulder Bookstore. I'll try to go in Monday to see if maybe they are hiring. But the trip tonight was purely for pleasure. I mentioned in a recent post my obsession with myth and romance. I had odd demands of what literature I wanted to read next. I didn't want a long novel, because I don't think I'd have time to finish it. I was hoping for short stories, maybe about America and Americans. I thought about a Steinbeck novel, one of his short works. But in the end I got O Pioneers! by Willa Cather, used for $6. It's the Norton Critical edition, too, in very good shape!

There's something about the way Cather writes about Nebraska that really resonates with me. It's rugged living, real life face to face with the harshness of nature, but through strong character and force of will, man finds a way to carve out a beautiful, meaningful existence. It's the kind of strength that I wish I had in my life.

Chris and I were talking about how we liked British Literature so much more than American Literature when we were in high school. I've come to really appreciate American literature, particularly later writers, but I still love British and World literature.

Americans:
John Steinbeck
William Faulkner
Mark Twain
F. Scott Fitzgerald
Ernest Hemingway
Kurt Vonnegut
J.D. Salinger
Willa Cather
Herman Melville
Nathaniel Hawthorne
Edgar Allan Poe
James Fenimore Cooper
Harper Lee
Sinclair Lewis
Ray Bradbury
Henry James
John Updike
Tennessee Williams
Saul Bellow
Flannery O'Connor

Brits:
William Shakespeare
Charles Dickens
Jane Austen
Charlotte Bronte
Emily Bronte
E.M. Forster
Aldous Huxley
Rudyard Kipling
William Golding
George Orwell
C.S. Lewis
J.R.R. Tolkien
Mary Shelley
Bram Stoker
Arthur Conan Doyle
William Thackeray
T.H. White
Joseph Conrad
Lewis Carrol
Christopher Marlowe
W. Somerset Maugham
Graham Greene
D.H. Lawrence
Thomas Hardy

Irish:
James Joyce
Bram Stoker

French:
Marcel Proust
Albert Camus
Victor Hugo
Gustave Flaubert
Antoine de St. Exupery
Jules Verne
Jean-Paul Sartre
Voltaire
Alexander Dumas
Honore de Balzac

German:
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Thomas Mann
Bertolt Brecht
Hermann Hesse
Günter Grass
Erich Maria Remarque
Arthur Schnitzler (Austrian)

Czech:
Franz Kafka

Russian:
Fyodor Dostoevsky
Anton Chekhov
Leo Tolstoy
Ivan Turgenev

Master's of Music Repertoire

I had my first lesson today, which basically was just a meeting about what I wanted to focus on the the next two years. I had thought about the rep that I wanted to play, and written down a fairly detailed list. I am not sure if I will learn any more concertos after Sibelius. I will want to learn how to play Tchaikovsky and Beethoven for sure, but mainly for fun. I won't need more than one well crafted major concerto for auditions, so I think my time here might be better spent elsewhere.

After talking about finishing all the Bach sonatas and partitas, Professor Bahn looked at the sonatas that I was interested in playing. They were all acceptable to her, and I'll play half on one recital and half on my second recital.

Brahms G major sonata
Beethoven sonata no. 5, "Spring"
Poulenc sonata

will be my first program, plus some short pieces like Kreisler works.

Schubert 'Duo' sonata
Debussy sonata
and either
Prokofiev sonata no. 2
or
Stravinsky Suite Italienne

I'm very excited to play just about every sonata I ever wished I could play! But it's a ton of music to learn in addition to finishing Sibelius and Bach, going through Rode Caprices, about 10 Paganini Caprices that I picked out, and of course scales, arpeggios, 3rds, 6ths, octaves, and 10ths. Plus orchestra, orchestral excerpts, and I'd really like to get involved in chamber music next semester. I'll be spending a lot of time in the practice rooms, for sure.

My Creed for 2012

I believe a God created the universe.
I believe He is a loving, but just God, who in the end cannot stand sin and imperfection.
I believe that we as human beings were created to have fellowship with God and to bring Him glory.
I believe that our selfish, sinful ways have blinded us to God's goodness and His will for our lives.
I believe that Jesus was a real man, who being God incarnate fulfilled the prophesies of Scripture to redeem mankind and restore fellowship with God for those who believe in Him.
I believe that the Christian Church should be a unified family, working together as the hands and feet of Christ.
I believe that the Christian Church should be accepting of everyone, particularly those on the outskirts of society, rather than judgmental hypocrites who dishonor God.

I believe in our taking personal responsibility for all decisions and actions we make.
I believe that reason was a tool given to man by God, and that we must use it to examine every claim.
I believe that it's okay to disagree with others, peacefully, and that the most important thing is to live a life full of integrity.
I believe that man has both a good and evil nature; the innate goodness of man is given by God, while the sin of a corrupt world usurps our goodness and innocence.
I believe that an absolute truth exists in God, however we cannot view the world without bias, creating the illusion of relativity through contextual histories.
I believe in the equality of the sexes, races, and sexual identities, and that God loves all equally, as we are all equally sinful.
I believe that the measure of a person's worth is based on the quality of his actions with regard to personal responsibility, selfless intentions, level of commitment to their action's right completion, and the loving, Godly influence on those around him or her.

Moving to Boulder

I am all moved in at my apartment in Boulder, Colorado!

It's taken a day to really process the fact that this is my home now. I'm so excited to get started back with music, now that I have the perspective I need to see exactly what I want to do with my life and how music fits into my dream.

Driving wasn't too bad, with dad's help. We split the driving about evenly. I drove the first 5 hours, he took the next 6, with a break for lunch, then we traded every 3 hours until we arrived. I've driven through Kentucky before and I didn't find anything more remarkable about it than the first time. Illinois went fairly quickly. The most interest thing to see was probably St. Louis. It is much larger than I imagined. Unfortunately, traffic slowed us down a bit, but we still arrived in Boulder before noon.

I drove through most of Kansas in the dark, but when the sun came out it was a striking landscape. It's so flat that you can see for miles, and the sky just seems to stretch forever. After about an hour it got pretty boring, though. I think dad took a southern route back just to get some new scenery. Eastern Colorado was just as flat as Kansas, and since it was a little hazy we couldn't see the mountains until we passed Denver.

Besides parking in the back alley, moving went pretty quickly, and I'm glad to say that everything fits quite nicely, including the table and chairs mom got for me. Dad and I made a list or two of things that I needed and we went shopping. He had paid for all the gas on the trip here, so I was glad that we got better gas mileage than estimated, and gas wasn't exorbitantly expensive. It's a real blessing to be set up until I can find a job.

I need to practice and study like mad today for my entrance exams. If I remember why I'm here I'll remain focused and diligent. I'm borrowing internet until I can afford my own, so there shouldn't be any distractions (except the mountains!) and I feel confident that this new chapter of my life will be a great one.

The Romance of Finality

To me, the greatest aspect of a story is the epic journey.

An epic is defined as: a long narrative poem in elevated style presenting characters of high position in adventures forming an organic whole through their relation to a central heroic figure and through their development of episodes important to the history of a nation or race. (Harmon and Holman)

A story which is epic is heroic in nature and on a grand scale. Central to the story is a quest, where the hero is tested and ultimately transformed through overcoming obstacles.

The hero generally participates in a cyclical journey or quest, faces adversaries that try to defeat him in his journey and returns home significantly transformed by his journey. The epic hero illustrates traits, performs deeds, and exemplifies certain morals that are valued by the society the epic originates from.

 A related genre is the romance. Early romances seem to embody many of the same attributes of the epic, and the Arthurian legend, though classified as a romance, seems very close to an epic.

The romance form is distinguished from the earlier epics of the Middle Ages by the changes of the twelfth century, which introduced courtly and chivalrous themes into the works.

I am a great lover of legends, myths, and any work in the epic or romantic style. Besides the great epics: The Iliad and the Odyssey, the Aeneid, Paradise Lost, and Dante's Divine Comedy, I love Edith Hamilton's Mythology, Goethe's Faust (part I), and J.R.R. Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings. I want to finish John Steinbeck's retelling of The Acts of King Arthur and his Noble Knights. Ovid's Metamorphosis is the number one book I want to buy and read (along with Adams' Watership Down, which has many epic qualities), and I want to translate my German books, Undine and Grimm's Fairytales.

I've been sidetracked trying to define what I love about romantic, fantastic, and epic literature, but this has all be to preface a longstanding fascination with final acts. In particular, the last march of the Ents, the last meeting of the fellowship before the Hobbits return to the Shire, and the eternal separation between Arwen and Elrond when she decides to stay with Aragorn rather than leave Middle Earth with the rest of her people.

Though I am glad to be able to stay in contact with all my friends, it's quite likely that we will never all be assembled in the same place again. Either in Vienna or Vanderbilt or Brentwood Academy. There's something tragic and haunting about the end of things. And while I have learned to let the things of the past go, I've also realized that it's important to remember where you've been. This is a new season of my life and while I am excited, it's a sobering thought that maybe I will never be living in the same place as Chris, Jeff, Trey, or even my family again. There's a magic and a sadness to the end of an era.

Does Luxury lead to Weakness?

There have been a great many inventions in the last century that have made our lives much more bearable. We can travel further, work more efficiently thanks to computers (and electricity in general), live longer with the advances of modern medicine, and communicate with the ones we love no matter how far away they are. We can be informed of all the latest news from all over the world instantaneously. And if you have the money, you can buy anything you could possibly dream of. (If it doesn't exist, someone could custom make it for you)

Since we can buy anything, provided we have enough money, money is king. More stuff is equal to a happier life. We want a life of luxury, and we don't want to work hard to earn it. We have become a materialistic society where everyone is looking out for number one. We are whiners when it comes to blood, sweat, and tears, and have become complacent and spoiled. There's a reason that we fell off the map in terms of education. We've lost our vision and can-do attitude. When we reach an obstacle, we no longer overcome.

I love to read books like The Little House on the Prairie, and My Ántonia. I love watching shows like Mountain Men and survivor shows like Man vs. Wild. I love the mountains because the grandeur of Nature helps give me perspective of my place in the world. In nature, no one cares about superficial things. I want to grow a garden and be self-reliant, while being able to create things of value in music and art.

Asceticism fascinates me. I want a simple life. For me, it's quality over quantity. I want to rid myself of distractions and be the best man I can possibly be. I feel that if everything is handed to me, I won't grow. Just the commercials for things like Real Housewives of wherever make me ill. People have completely lost touch with reality. That's why I love Kathy Griffin so much; because she lampoons all of Hollywood and the lifestyle of exorbitance.

But more to the original point of this post, what happened to our steely resolve? Top Gear humorously shows how we panic so quickly, often for no real reason. Our parents used to joke about how 'when I was a child, I had to walk to school in the snow, uphill both ways.' And it used to be typical dad fashion to say to kids 'It builds character.' (You know, back when dads stayed in the family picture.) Now we have overprotective, helicopter parents who baby and spoil their children. In the old days 10 year old kids were mature and responsible for things like running a farm while taking care of 3 younger siblings. And even if kids these days are true go-getters, they have to deal with bureaucratic bull like this.

My last thought for now is whether self-denial has any inherent value anymore. In our material culture where more is better, and immediate pleasure and entertainment mean big business, no one can say no. With our credit cards, we buy things with money we won't have for months. Everyone is in debt because they can't wait to spend money until after they've actually earned it. And banks were so greedy they lent people money who had no business buying such large houses. But government and American greed is another topic.

We want everything, and we want it all now. There's no joy in the anticipation of waiting. There is no journey, only the destination. Life has become all about who has the biggest toys in the sandbox, and by the time people realize that our possessions in and of themselves can't make us happy, it's too late.