2015

2015 is here! Well, it's been here for almost a month now. It's been a long time since I've blogged regularly, and I'm hoping to get back to writing on a schedule this year. A lot of times when I'm under stress or feeling like life is getting away from me - something that is inevitable - I retreat to a pattern of comfortable indulgences and denial. In short, when life gets tough, I cower. And then I feel guilty because I know my problems are so insignificant. It's unfortunate that guilt is such a horrible motivating force, and more often than not simply leads to a death spiral.

But it's a new year, and I'm hoping to work hard to change my perspective on life and music. It's so easy for me to settle for my absolute minimal effort, I know it'll be a struggle to overcome indifference. I've come up with a plan to build new habits and grow to be a mature, responsible adult.

First, I must return to a focus on taking care of myself. I think I made significant progress when I was out in Boulder and I realized how much of a difference it makes when my body is functioning at its best. It sounds so simple that I'm surprised how long I've overlooked my health. So I pledge to Sleep well, Eat well, Drink well, and Exercise.

My second goal is to replace mindless entertainment with intellectual stimulation and creativity. I love YouTube and I believe that there can be a place for it in my life, but it has taken over my life. I want to incorporate time for meditation and deep thought into my day, preferably in the morning. The sources of my musings will come from reading and art. In Vienna I have an excellent opportunity to experience world class music and paintings firsthand. I would also like to return to drawing and writing poetry. Movies and theater should also not be forgotten. And finally, and perhaps most importantly (in a practice sense), I must wholeheartedly study and learn German if I hope to have any future career in Europe.

These two parts to a solid foundation will give me the energy and mental acuity to progress rapidly in my music studies, and hopefully I will find a renewed passion for the violin. In support of this plan to find joy and meaning in my life, I must not isolate myself. I can no longer ignore philosophy and religion and accept that only through struggling with the essential questions of life will I truly become happy. But most important of all, I will have to call upon friends to help me. Together we can hold each other accountable, discuss ideas and feelings, and love one another.

In summary:
Sleep well, Eat well, Drink well, and Exercise.
Experience music, art, and read thought provoking books and articles and reflect on them.
Study German.
Practice the violin.
Engage in philosophical discussions with friends.