I Hate Allergies

I know I'm not sick by normal standards. I think the allergy medications are kicking in (finally) but unfortunately I already have a bad cough. I've been combating it with my puffer and cough syrups, which make life manageable, as long as I don't laugh too hard. Coughing fits aren't keeping me up at night like they have before, so I know it could be worse. I'm just not getting better. Of course, in the big picture I'm not dying, so I have nothing to complain about. It's enough for me to realize what a priceless gift good health is.

I also checked my bank account last night because I knew my health insurance was going to hit, but unfortunately it had already gone through and my next few transactions incurred fees. I was lucky enough to call the bank and get 2 of the overdraft charges removed, but I'm still not in the black. The reality that I have zero dollars has sunk in, and this is another step in learning how the world really works. I don't think I live a lavish life or don't understand the value of the dollar, but I hadn't given my finances any serious thought until today. I've always been sort of indifferent towards money. It's a means to an end, and I think I'm fortunate that it doesn't have a stranglehold over me. I think I'm a rather generous friend (at least in terms of gift giving) and I'm not stingy. I don't like to waste money and it often takes several trips to a store to talk myself into buying myself a new book or CD. It does bother me when I think that Mom buys more things than she can afford, like multiple dresses for Grace. But I do think that I have a certain lifestyle which includes a modest amount of expenses, and I've never really thought any more about spending money besides if I'm wasting it or not.

Talking to Dad helped better clarify the issue of being a responsible steward of my finances. He is far from a luxurious lifestyle, but he basically lives hand to mouth, and has practically no savings for retirement. Of course I'm practical enough to have a vague idea that 'I should start saving money,' but I have no plan. And without a plan, money will slip through my fingers. Martha can help me get back in the black until I earn some more money from Dad, but we're still unsure of how much work he will have this summer for me. I'm thinking that it would be smarter to find a steady job where I can form a schedule for this summer and a plan for my future. In the mean time I hope I don't cough up a lung.